Turns out that using the blues as a theme for writing haiku is kind of hard. The haiku format being all about close observation of small things, the blues tend to muck that up with their broad base of misery and pain. I tried a couple things this week while tweeting blues haikus, some traditional blues themes (my woman done left me, met the devil at the crossroads) and some more modern blues subjects (taxes, lost keys, ketchup), all of them a little funky for the process.
While working out three haiku a day I was also going to try and include at least one Burma-Shave poem, but that muse is on vacation. There are a couple of attempts here, but only a couple. The hardest part seemed to be coming up with themes, which was odd because I never found myself wanting in the haiku department. And when I tried to take a haiku and turn it into a Burma-Shave poem that was even worse.
So here’s what I’ve written and tweeted since last Friday:
2 April 2011
woke up this morning
sun too bright, the house too cold
day’s young, feeling oldbad breath cottonmouth
stomach kicked in my a mule
sour party beersilvery fishes
tumbling into darkness
keys in the riverPublic statement
Artist fined
That’s where police
Draw the line3 April 2011
Hawaii had its
Sugar reign
Better known as
Raising canedown at the dog park:
smirking ~ someone stepped in “it”
look before you laugh.full ketchup bottle
smack it hard until it… oops
better get a spooninnocent night sky
echoes with violent curses
locked out of the house4 April 2011
down at the crossroads
to trade my soul for used blues
devil says “no deal”come through the front door
thought I heard the back door slam…
wrong house, sorry, ma’amcar was repossessed
lost my job, the rent is due
park benches are free5 April 2011
nighttime stumbles in
blind and drunken, while Day breaks
sledgehammers on glassvampyre bitten
instantly spits out my blood
too bitter to drinksleeping on the job
boss: “it’s written on your face”
keyboard imprinted6 April 2011
railroad yard blues
spent the night getting chased out
hobo rejectedfloating in my soup
not a fly: no legs, no wings~
bellybutton lintlost, late coming home
my baby thought I left her
she burned the house down7 April 2011
(I took a break from the blues on Buddha’s birthday)
honoring Buddha
remember to pour sweet tea
on his head, not yourswhen you look ahead
see the Buddha on the road?
probably squirrelsBuddha’s old
perfect birthday gift?
that dependsheavenly dragons
shower all things with sweet rain
every flower bloomsmind empty, heart full
meditating or in love
heart full, mind empty
What I ended up liking about the blues haikus is that they had sort of a joke quality to them, an expectation and a punchline that replaced the usual description/observation format. It was also fun to play against the conventions of traditional blues in thinking up what would make for modern blues subjects. Heartbreak and poor, yeah yeah, but what about getting caught sleeping on the job or waiting for a bus that never comes?
So that’s one week down. Three more to go. That’s at least 60 more blues haikus. If you want to follow along on Twitter I’m @delzey. And if you’d rather wait and get them all in a bunch, I’ll be rounding them up here once a week.
It’s the second Poetry Friday of National Poetry Month, and there’s a full-frontal assault of poetry all over the place! Madigan McGillicuddy is hosting the round-up this week over at her place. “Go forth under the open sky, and list to Nature’s teachings!”
woke up this morning
sun too bright, the house too cold
day’s young, feeling old
Now that sounds like the beginning of a great song.
I agree that the broad themes of blues and the precise nature of haiku can result in culture clash. But I applaud you for thinking of this usual matchup and seeing it through to where it leads. You never know—you might invent a new form—blu-ku.
in my mind, sara, i had hoped i could write all of them like this, the first two lines structured like a blues verse that would be repeated with the last line being the sort of refrain. if i wasn’t dedicate to writing them daily i might have been able to make some of the others fit this model.
also, there’s something about the mix of blues and haikus that reminds me of the old steve martin joke about how you can’t sing a depressing song while playing a banjo. which i think is why these feel more humorous to me.
Love the mix of blues and Buddha, Dave! You’re really good at this.
i write a lot of these in my head while walking. something about the rhythm of walking and hitting the beats of syllables.
i had fun with the buddha ones, too. thanks.
Tracking my day through your haikus:
5 a.m.:
woke up this morning
sun too bright, the house too cold
day’s young, feeling old
7 a.m.:
heavenly dragons
shower all things with sweet rain
every flower blooms
4 p.m.???
down at the dog park:
smirking ~ someone stepped in “it”
look before you laugh.
Thanks David…I’ll have to check to see what else you’ve predicted!
I’ve loved (trying to) keeping up with your twitkus as they rolled out, but DANG you’re prolific! Thanks for rounding them all up here — I missed a few (notably, the entire Buddha series — tea on your head, indeed!).
Hmm…I’m getting an idea for my poems next week…maybe teachkus…three a day to capture the flow of fourth grade in a series of blinks…hmmm….